Dark Corners and Hidden Places
by Bitersweet
Summary: A boy in his bed, an angry kiss and a startling revelation bring Mello down a road he really, really didn't want to go near.


There was someone on Mello's bed when he came back from dinner.

This in itself wasn't entirely unusual. His best friend, Matt, had the annoying habit of using his bed to take his afternoon naps. He always laughed when Mello yelled at him about it, claiming he had the softest bed in all of Wammy's. How was he supposed to resist?

Well, he had a point – Mello enjoyed his comfort and no one could claim there weren't certain advantages of being Wammy's brightest. Alright… second brightest. As much as it pained Mello to admit it – not that he ever had – the brightest boy in the institute was the one currently sitting in Mello's bed. Near.

For a moment, Mello stayed by the door, dumbfounded at what he was seeing. He wondered briefly if he was seeing things, but Near was still there after he rubbed his eyes.

He was sitting in the corner of the bed, with his knees pulled to his chest, cradling his arms around himself. His head was resting on the wall, leaving his soft, delicate neck exposed. His eyes were closed and his breathing was even, but Mello didn't believe for a second he was sleeping. Near was too smart to leave himself so openly vulnerable like that in Mello's room, which he should consider 'hostile territory'. Just by being alone in there, Near was making himself dangerously defenseless, awake or not. They were enemies, after all, whether Near would admit it or not. He should know Mello would like nothing more than to catch him in a place where he could get some unsupervised vengeance for all the wrongs Near had caused in his life, be them real or imaginary. Mello smiled maliciously – the irritation he felt from finding his nemesis in his safe haven disappeared, rapidly replaced with lovely promises of payback.

He decided not to act on the right away. He was curious, Near must have had a very good reason to be there, especially since it meant being away from Roger's protection, and Near was usually nothing if not cautious around Mello, since a time he'd decided to make it clear was no chance of friendship for them in a rather painful way. It had cost him three weeks of outside visits, but it had been worth it.

He knew Near must have been aware of his presence by then, but for some enigmatic reason he continued to keep his eyes closed. The better for himself, thought Mello, quietly picking up one of the pillows he'd left lying on the floor that morning. He span it mischievously on his hands, aimed it at Near's face, then threw it forcefully at the boy. He smiled contentedly when a yelp of surprise and pain let him know he had hit his target.

"I don't see how that was necessary." Remarked Near, casually rubbing the place where the pillow had hit him. He said it in that infuriatingly neutral tone Mello hated so much, but his slightly red face and ruffled hair brought Mello a tremendous amount satisfaction.

"There was an intruder in my room." Mello said, in what would be a perfect imitation of Near's tone of voice if he'd managed to keep the laughter off his voice. "I had to defend myself."

Near eyed him curiously, considering his words. "Was Mello expecting to be attacked?" He tilted his head to the side, eyes clouded in contemplation, frowning only ever so slightly.

Mello snorted, torn between a mixture of amusement and contempt. That little sheep and his literal mind. Analyzing emotions had never been Near's best skill, but he really should have known better by then. Could he really think Mello would fear him, the helpless little thing he was?

"Maybe I was." He chuckled to himself as he sat on the chair by his desk. He took a moment to appraise the boy in his bed. There was still a trace of red in his cheeks, perhaps from embarrassment, perhaps because he felt exposed under the scrutiny of Mello's gaze.

His very presence seemed to clash in Mello's room. He was a single splash of white among the grays and blacks and reds Mello preferred. Mello hadn't wanted anything white in the room, not even the walls, which were painted a light shade of gray, mostly because Roger had refused to let him paint them in a darker color.

"I didn't mean to frighten Mello." Near whispered to himself, almost too quietly for Mello to hear him. He seemed strangely earnest and repentant, which mostly annoyed Mello, but also got to a part of him that was somewhat endeared by the boy's misguided remorse. Mello whished there was a way to strangle that single part of himself.

Still, he had to laugh. The little bunny had walked straight into the wolf's lair and still had the nerve of thinking he was big enough to frighten it. Mello bared his teeth in a harsh smile. Luckily for the bunny, that particular wolf liked to play with his food.

But now he was getting impatient. Too much time had passed and he still didn't know why Near was in his room and Mello did not like not knowing things.

"Why are you here, Near?" Mello asked, impatiently clicking his tongue on his teeth.

Near didn't answer for a long time, even though Mello was sure he'd heard him. He was staring a navy paint stain on the wall, back from a few months before, when Mello had discovered he wasn't a very good artist.

Mello was about to repeat the question, getting angrier by the second it went unanswered, when Near finally spoke.

"There is something I wished to discuss with Mello." Near answered, still staring at the wall as if it was the object of his words.

The vague answer and continued lack of eye contact did nothing to sooth Mello's temper. He was starting to feel the slight twitch of his eyebrow which told him he would do something rash if he didn't calm down very soon. What the hell could Near have to talk about that he could only do in Mello's room. If he wasn't aware of Near's extraordinary lack of sense of humor he'd think he was playing a prank of him.

"What about Near?" He asked, very slowly through his gritted teeth. It made him feel a little better, talking to Near like he was an idiot. He decided that if he didn't get a straight answer he'd kick him out of his room, like he should have done in the first place. Maybe leave him with a few bruises as a farewell gift and a reminder not to come again.

He was ready to do it, already moving to grab Near by his shirt when he heard the boy say something under his breath. It was inaudible in Near's soft voice. What the hell was the matter with that boy, Mello thought angrily. He usually wasn't the one to beat around the bush. On the contrary, actually, he was normally so direct with people he made them uncomfortable.

"What?!" Mello demanded, now feeling the twitch of his eyebrow getting stronger and he knew his patience was about to expire. Near didn't comply, still refusing to look at Mello and pulling a strand of his hair so firmly and repeatedly it looked painful.

Mello finally felt the last of his self-control slipping away from his clenched hands.

He leapt to the bed, making it jump under his weight and grabbed Near's face, forcing him to face him.

Near seemed to recoil at his touch, but made only a feeble attempt to escape Mello's grasp. He was probably too afraid to move, thought Mello, smirking to the boy in front of him.

But now that he could finally look into those great gray eyes, he saw that they held no fear. And suddenly he wasn't holding a frightened little rabbit between his hands, but a defiant young man, staring into his eyes. Those eyes shone like steel, but somehow weren't as cold. No, they weren't cold at all, like Mello was expecting them to be. They were wide and warm and Mello thought they'd swallow him whole if he kept staring at them. And yet, he stared. He stared for a long time, and yet he couldn't make sense of what he was seeing. Then again, he'd never been able to make sense of Near.

He hoped he was making him uncomfortable, he thought fiercely. He really hoped, but he couldn't tell. Nothing seemed to make Near uncomfortable, or angry, or afraid, or anything. It was just another reason to hate him, something else he had Mello lacked. He couldn't keep his feeling from bubbling to the surface against his will, couldn't shed that skin of emotion and rawness that he felt was holding him down. He couldn't help being an open book, available for anyone who'd want to look inside.

And then there was that boy, that sheep who'd taken everything from him, and he knew nothing about him, nothing of substance at least. Mello hated not knowing things.

He was a book locked with keys Mello couldn't reach, and all he wanted was open him a little. See the inside, make him feel as raw as he always did.

He kissed him. And he didn't know what was it in that swirl of thoughts that made him do it, but he didn't regret it. Near's lips were soft and still and he seemed frozen under Mello's lips, but Mello's hands could feel the warmth that suddenly rushed into his face.

He kept the kiss going, mostly because he didn't know what to do when it was over.

He opened his eyes before pulling away from Near, wanting to see his expression when he was suffering from such a clear violation of his boundaries. He was waiting to see shock, maybe finally a bit of the fear he rightfully should have for Mello, but he only saw defeat and resignation. How curious, he thought, pulling away form him.

He wasn't expecting the shyness that seemed to suddenly possess him as soon as they broke apart. For a moment, he had to resist the impulse to look away from Near, avoid his eyes like Near had done to him. It was just a kiss, he thought angrily to himself. At least to him it was. He looked mockingly at Near, smirking as if he'd just played a particularly malicious trick.

Near's face was a blank canvas once more. Or at least Near tried to make it so. But he couldn't hide his dilated pupils, the quickened heartbeat Mello could feel with his hands that were still cradling Near's face. He couldn't hide the pink tinge that spread down his neck and to his chest, down to areas hidden by his shirt.

It was a victory, Mello thought, smiling to himself. Any reaction was a victory.

He withdrew his hand from Near's face, worried he might take it as a gesture of gentleness or affection in his part. He didn't want there to be any misunderstandings about his intentions.

"Why did Mello do that?" asked Near slowly, and Mello's heart swelled with pleasure as when he heard the slight break in his voice. He'd gotten to him.

Mello shrugged noncommittally, smirking to himself. Why should he give a straight answer when he'd been refused one? He wasn't even sure he could give a straight answer. Why had he done it? Maybe because Near was annoying him and he wanted to make him uncomfortable. Maybe because it seemed like a way to control him. Maybe… he had never been that close to someone and maybe Near was pretty up close, prettier than any girl he'd seen before. Mello scratched the last one from his mental list. He didn't know how that thought had invaded his mind, but he absolutely did not think Near was pretty. Near was anything but pretty, he was strange and repulsive and Mello didn't imagine his hair would be soft to touch and he didn't find the way Near was nervously biting his lip an appealing sight at all.

Near seemed even more disquieted by Mello's silence, shrinking bashfully under Mello's eyes and pushing himself further against the wall, trying to make himself even smaller than he already was.

A delightful thought bubbled up in Mello's mind and he laughed again. "This was your first kiss, wasn't it?"

In fact, it had been Mello's first kiss too, but that wasn't relevant. What did a kiss mean to someone like him? But to Near… to innocent little Near, didn't like to look people in the eye, didn't like to be touched, who always kept others at an arm's length… Mello smiled widely. How appropriate, that he'd been the one to steal Near's first kiss, when he's stolen so much from him. He should thank him, he thought, laughing to himself. If it wasn't for him the little freak would have probably gone unkissed for the rest of his life.

Unfortunately for Mello, his self-congratulatory train of thought was abruptly interrupted by the next words that came out of Near's mouth.

"Actually, no it wasn't."

* * *

 **AN: Hey! I couldn't resist the urge to do some Meronia, even know I should be working on other things xD**

 **I hope you like it! Let me know in the comments what you think. I'm unsure whether to continue this or not, but I had fun writing it. :)**

 **Thanks for reading!**


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